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I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies)

2004-06-08 Biography & Autobiography
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Release : 2004-06-08
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
Kind : eBook
Book Rating : 02X/5 ( reviews)

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Book Synopsis I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies) by : Laurie Notaro

Download or read book I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies) written by Laurie Notaro. This book was released on 2004-06-08. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Here are more scathingly funny tales from the wild side! Laurie Notaro survived the debauched ride of her twenties and the bumpy road to matrimony. Now she’s ready to take on the thirtysomething years . . . and almost middle age has never been more hilarious. Laurie is married, mortgaged, and now—miraculously—employed in the corporate world, discovering that bosses come in all shapes, sizes, and degrees of mental stability. After maxing out her last good credit card at Banana Republic, she’s dressed for success and ready to face the jungle: surviving feral, six-foot-plus Gretchen (“Three Thousand Faces of Eve”) before battling the overbearing, overstuffed (in way-too-small pants) new mom Suzzi, who ruthlessly cancels Laurie’s newspaper column and learns that payback can be a bitch. Laurie also explores the backstabbing world of preschoolers at a Halloween party, the X-rated madness of a family trip to Disneyland, and the pressure from her QVC-addicted mother and the rest of the world to reproduce. But while losing more friends to babies than to booze, she realizes there’s a plus side: at least for a couple of months she gets to be the thinner friend. I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies) is Laurie Notaro at her deliciously quirky best. Can a woman prone to what her loved ones might term “meltdowns” (she considers them “Opportunities to Enlighten”) put a smile on her face and love everybody? Take a guess.

I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies)

2004
Download I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies) PDF Online Free

Author :
Release : 2004
Genre :
Kind : eBook
Book Rating : /5 ( reviews)

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Book Synopsis I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies) by : Laurie Notaro

Download or read book I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies) written by Laurie Notaro. This book was released on 2004. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

We Thought You Would Be Prettier

2005-04-19 Biography & Autobiography
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Release : 2005-04-19
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
Kind : eBook
Book Rating : 014/5 ( reviews)

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Book Synopsis We Thought You Would Be Prettier by : Laurie Notaro

Download or read book We Thought You Would Be Prettier written by Laurie Notaro. This book was released on 2005-04-19. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: She thought she’d have more time. Laurie Notaro figured she had at least a few good years left. But no–it’s happened. She has officially lost her marbles. From the kid at the pet-food store checkout line whose coif is so bizarre it makes her seethe “I’m going to kick his hair’s ass!” to the hapless Sears customer-service rep on the receiving end of her Campaign of Terror, no one is safe from Laurie’s wrath. Her cranky side seems to have eaten the rest of her–inner-thigh Chub Rub and all. And the results are breathtaking. Her riffs on e-mail spam (“With all of these irresistible offers served up to me on a plate, I WANT A PENIS NOW!!”), eBay (“There should be an eBay wading pool, where you can only bid on Precious Moments figurines and Avon products, that you have to make it through before jumping into the deep end”), and the perils of St. Patrick’s Day (“When I’m driving, the last thing I need is a herd of inebriates darting in and out of traffic like loaded chickens”) are the stuff of legend. And for Laurie, it’s all true.

The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club

2002-07-02 Biography & Autobiography
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Release : 2002-07-02
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
Kind : eBook
Book Rating : 434/5 ( reviews)

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Book Synopsis The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club by : Laurie Notaro

Download or read book The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club written by Laurie Notaro. This book was released on 2002-07-02. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER “I’ve changed a bit since high school. Back then I said no to using and selling drugs. I washed on a normal basis and still had good credit.” Introducing Laurie Notaro, the leader of the Idiot Girls’ Action-Adventure Club. Every day she fearlessly rises from bed to defeat the evil machinations of dolts, dimwits, and creepy boyfriends—and that’s before she even puts on a bra. For the past ten years, Notaro has been entertaining Phoenix newspaper readers with her wildly amusing autobiographical exploits and unique life experiences. She writes about a world of hourly-wage jobs that require absolutely no skills, a mother who hands down judgments more forcefully than anyone seated on the Supreme Court, horrific high school reunions, and hangovers that leave her surprised that she woke up in the first place. The misadventures of Laurie and her fellow Idiot Girls (“too cool to be in the Smart Group”) unfold in a world that everyone will recognize but no one has ever described so hilariously. She delivers the goods: life as we all know it.

Autobiography of a Fat Bride

2003-07-08 Biography & Autobiography
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Release : 2003-07-08
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
Kind : eBook
Book Rating : 92X/5 ( reviews)

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Book Synopsis Autobiography of a Fat Bride by : Laurie Notaro

Download or read book Autobiography of a Fat Bride written by Laurie Notaro. This book was released on 2003-07-08. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The author of the New York Times bestseller The Idiot Girls’ Action-Adventure Club tackles her biggest challenge yet: grown-up life. In Autobiography of a Fat Bride, Laurie Notaro tries painfully to make the transition from all-night partyer and bar-stool regular to mortgagee with plumbing problems and no air-conditioning. Laurie finds grown-up life just as harrowing as her reckless youth, as she meets Mr. Right, moves in, settles down, and crosses the toe-stubbing threshold of matrimony. From her mother's grade-school warning to avoid kids in tie-dyed shirts because their hippie parents spent their food money on drugs and art supplies; to her night-before-the-wedding panic over whether her religion is the one where you step on the glass; to her unfortunate overpreparation for the mandatory drug-screening urine test at work; to her audition as a Playboy centerfold as research for a newspaper story, Autobiography of a Fat Bride has the same zits-and-all candor and outrageous humor that made Idiot Girls an instant cult phenomenon. In Autobiography of a Fat Bride, Laurie contemplates family, home improvement, and the horrible tyrannies of cosmetic saleswomen. She finds that life doesn't necessarily get any easier as you get older. But it does get funnier.

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